At the beginning of a love everything seems perfect but then, thanks to everyday life, small habits creep in that can wear down the relationship. Here are the most insidious dynamics that ruin a couple relationships and how to avoid them.
Bad habits that ruin a couple relationship
At the beginning of a love story it’s all roses and flowers but then even the most resistant plants, if left untreated, tend to wilt. Often it doesn’t happen for lack of feeling or will, but for distraction. Thanks to everyday life, we get used to thinking that that wonderful plant that is our relationship will always be there, will resist the weather and will always be in bloom, in an eternal spring. But this is not the case: couples relationships need nourishment and daily attention in order to grow, strengthen their roots, sprout, and evolve.
The desire to always be right or the claim that one’s needs are always supported, excluding the possibility of reaching a compromise and without taking care of the partner’s needs: the classic “we do as I say”. When selfishness ends up prevailing over common projects, they undermine them at the foundations and the couple collapses.
Routine exists, but often not enough is done to counter it. Why? Out of laziness. Over time, a slothful attitude tends to develop which leads to taking people and feelings for granted, thinking that there is no need or time to make that romantic gesture, to seduce, to have special attention or to carve out the space being together. But love does not accept indifference.
To some extent it can even be a symptom of the couple’s good health, but more often it becomes a destructive drive, which has its roots in the insecurity and fear of abandoning those who test it, weakening the trust between the partners. The retroactive jealousy, the feeling one feels towards the ex of the partner, is the victims. There are many relationships that have ended for this reason: trust is in fact a fundamental ingredient in a healthy relationship, and where anyone suspects that it goes without saying that trusting others is only a good memory.
Not having your own space, your time
At the beginning you want to spend a lot of time together, on any occasion. So – in addition to annoying friends, who can no longer see us unless “accompanied” – you risk getting used to a symbiotic bond, in which individual spaces are lacking, and sooner or later the sensation of asphyxiation arrives. Vanessa Bryant Reveals Her One Wish After The Deaths Of Husband Kobe And Daughter Gianna Bryant. Furthermore, the lack of individual spaces leads to losing sight of oneself and one’s personal goals, with the result that slowly the partner will no longer see the person he fell in love with.
The lack of sincerity
It does not matter whether they are big or small lies towards the partner or the lack of honesty towards one’s desires, thoughts, needs, feelings. In the first case, if the lies are discovered, a flaw is formed in the fabric of trust that could extend out of all proportion, completely tearing it apart. In the second, however, you risk finding yourself living a relationship you don’t want.
The fear of confrontation
Sometimes we turn a blind eye to partner’s attitudes and behaviors that annoy or hurt us. But if you don’t approach the topic for fear of fighting , then you risk exploding like a pressure cooker, causing greater damage.
The lack of dialogue
It is when we pretend to be in the partner’s head, to know exactly how he feels, what he is thinking, what he wants and what he needs, how he will behave and why. Maybe wrong.
Alton Clarke was born and raised in Syracuse. He has written for MSNBC, The Business Insider and Passport Magazine. In regards to academics, Alton earned a degree from St. John’s University. Alton covers entertainment and culture stories here at Diving daily.